One Saturday night a few weeks before Christmas, Kristina and Rob attended a holiday party at another married couple’s house. Kristina and Rob had only lived in the area for six months, and they were newlyweds.

Feeling a little insecure at the party, Kristina started to make small talk with a few women in the living room while Rob gravitated toward the other husbands, who were watching a basketball game on TV.

“Those men are always watching sports,” said Sara, the hostess of the party.

Another woman spoke up. “Yeah, they’re always yelling like animals and ignoring us.”

Some of the women gathered in the living room rolled their eyes in agreement.

Kristina watched the women in silence, wanting to participate in the conversation but unsure what to say. Rob was a wonderful husband, she thought. She enjoyed watching basketball with him, and in the past few months, they had learned to share household tasks and fun activities in a way that agreed with both of them.

She glanced at him as he greeted his peers.

Taking a step closer to Kristina, Sara elbowed her: “So what do you think of married life so far?” The other women gazed at her, waiting for her answer.

“It’s pretty good,” said Kristina. The question had caught her by surprise. “We have had a few rocky moments, but I like it.”

“Just you wait a few months,” said Sara. “When Matt and I reached the one-year mark, I was ready to call it quits. We fought so much that first year.”

Kristina said nothing.

“When the going gets tough, my husband always walks away,” said another woman. “He likes to slam the door and go hide in his video game room. We call it the ‘man-cave.’” The other women laughed.

Feeling the pressure to complain too, Kristina said, “Well I guess Rob can be a little hot-tempered sometimes.”

At this, the other women started to voice negative comments about their own husbands. When the men saw the conversation heating up among their wives, a few of them walked toward the living room.

“Are you all talking about us?” asked Matt, Sara’s husband. “They never stop complaining,” he said, as he looked at the other men.

Glancing around at the other guys, Rob looked nervous, like the new kid in class. “You know what they always say,” Rob said. “‘Wedding rings are the world’s smallest handcuffs.’”

At Rob’s comment, the entire room erupted in laughter — that is, except for Kristina.

As she looked at her new husband’s hands, the hands that she had held on her wedding day while they said their vows, Kristina’s stomach felt like it had been tied into a knot. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she hurried away to hide in the bathroom.

Rob looked down at the gold band on his ring finger and realized that he did not at all believe what he had just said. And now his wife was injured by his words.